So, I'm 24....

My birthday was yesterday and I guess I'm now officially in my mid-20s. Woohoo. It didn't really feel like much of a birthday, but we're not celebrating until Sunday so maybe that's why. The day started out at 2:30am with Aiden waking up and not going back to bed for nearly 2 hours. I then couldn't fall asleep until 6am and Aiden woke me up again at 8am. I was so exhausted and spent most of the morning in tears from sleep deprivation and a headache. It did get better throughout the day, even though John had class and didn't get home until 9pm. He gave me some great presents and they were just what I wanted. The new Maroon 5 CD, the 2nd season of Bones on DVD, and an MP3 player to fill with relaxing music for use during labor! I had been dropping hints about that last one for MONTHS. I'm quite happy with my hubby. :^)

Also, I had another appointment with the midwife this morning and everything looks great. She was a little concerned that in the past 2 weeks (and over Thanksgiving), I apparently only gained a half pound! They're still wanting me to hit 135, so I have 6 1/2 pounds to go. But, she said I'm measuring right on time so it's not too worrying, just keep eating. She thinks I'm on track to have a 7 pounder, which is right about where Aiden was (7 lb, 1 oz). Next time, I get the Strep B swab test and I just found something out about it that I wasn't aware of and am now dreading a little. Like, where exactly they swab....
After this next appointment in 2 weeks, I don't get seen again until January 2 because of their weird holiday schedules. I'll be 38 weeks then, so we'll see if I make it. I'm kind of hoping not, but of course I want this baby to be done baking before he comes out.
Am I getting a little impatient, you ask? Why yes I am! I mentioned to the midwife that everything hurts everywhere and I'm constantly exhausted (hence the impatience). She said it sounds like a typical 2nd pregnancy to her. I said to John afterwards, "So I'm supposed to feel as though I'm dying!".

I'm beginning to feel a little overwhelmed, but it's probably just because I'm so tired. If only the apartment would stay clean all by itself...

Loss of a loved one

I got a call this afternoon, letting me know that my great-grandma had passed away Sunday evening. This wasn't a surprise; we had been told a few weeks ago that she might go at any time. I haven't seen her since I was 5, so I wasn't terribly close with her. And for the past couple years, she's been suffering from dementia quite badly, so even if I had tried to strengthen our relationship, she wouldn't have known who I was. And though I wasn't close with her, it's still hard. Losing a loved one, especially around the holidays, is never easy. The strangest feeling though, is knowing of her passing while I'm preparing to bring another life into this world. It just sort of reminds you how things really do work. Lives end and lives begin and on and on it goes. Maybe it's just one of those "morbid" things that we don't really like to think about, but deep down we know that's how it is. Even though I hadn't seen her in nearly 20 years, there's still a part of me that is saddened by the thought that Aiden and Nathan will never know her.

The funeral is Friday and if I could ask for those of you who read this to keep my grandma and her sister in prayer as they lay their mom to rest. They've been caring for her and watching her suffer (in the past couple of weeks, she had stopped eating and drinking). While I know they are relieved that she is no longer in pain, I know it's still very hard for them. They are on the east coast, so I won't be able to attend the funeral and be there with them. I'll actually be at a doctor's appointment during the funeral time, listening to my unborn child's heartbeat. It would be hard not to think of her listening to the same little heartbeat from heaven.

At least we got a tour of sorts....

I was sent in to Maternity at St. V's this afternoon. There had been some concern on my part since last Sunday about possibly leaking fluid. I called the on-call midwife on Wednesday to get her opinion and was told to keep an eye on it and what specifically to watch for. Then during church this morning, I was pretty convinced that it had gotten worse. I had a nice lunch with the extended family, discussed my concerns with my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law/nurse in training/labor support person. I think they were about to throw me in the car and take me themselves, so I agreed to call again. Luckily, the same midwife was on call today and she remembered speaking with me on Wednesday. She told me to come right in, so we left Aiden with the family and headed over.

Once we got there, things happened fairly quickly. They were pretty busy too, but I was in a gown and hooked up to a monitor within 10 minutes. I stressed the fact that I wasn't positive about what I was leaking, but that I was concerned about it. They were very up front in telling me that if I was leaking fluid, I would not be going home until the baby was born. Just what I need at 33 weeks and a 2 year old depending on me....
Thankfully though, the exam and stick test showed that I wasn't losing amniotic fluid. I will, however, leave out the lovely details of the explanation for you. I apologized for taking up a bed and the nurse just laughed and said that it wasn't a big deal and that they have women in there multiple times a day, wondering if they're losing fluid when they aren't. I was scolded a bit for apologizing and reminded that being this early yet, I should never feel sorry for wanting to make sure that everything is ok with the baby.

I am glad we went, even though I still feel slightly as though I took up their time. I've been worrying about it all week and now I can relax and know that this baby can bake for a little while longer. It was also nice to know where to go and what the process will be like when it finally happens. It takes a bit of anxiety off the whole experience. So, sigh of relief for me and now it's time for a bath and some very deep sleep.

A never-ending line of onesies and sleepers

I thought I was done sorting through the size of baby clothes that we will need right away. They've been washed, dried, and folded. Then I realized that we were missing a few outfits that Aiden wore when he was that size. Lo and behold, there are actually more boxes of newborn baby clothes that need to be washed and sorted. Oh boy. We have baby clothes coming out of our eyeballs. And this is after I went through it all and gave away a bunch because I thought we had too many. I am not joking when I say that there is THREE loads of laundry worth of JUST the 0-6 months size clothes. I'm not even going to touch the mass of boxes that is holding a small store's worth of bigger sizes. Just when I think I'm almost done preparing for this baby.....

On a side note, I have yet again finished off an entire box of powdered donuts. Bring on the Thanksgiving dinner! It's probably a good thing I ordered bigger maternity tops from Old Navy. ;^)

Being married

I had a date with my husband yesterday. It had been about a month and a half since we'd had some time for just us. Not that I mind having my toddler around constantly, but every mom needs a break. This time though, it wasn't so much getting away from Aiden as it was getting to actually talk to my husband.

It was time to get our wedding rings cleaned, so we went over to Shane Co. to get that done. A tiny side diamond had fallen out of my ring, so I had to leave it there to be repaired. We won't be able to pick it up until Friday, so I'm going to be feeling pretty naked without it. After that, we went over to the mall to just wander for a while. It wasn't all that relaxing as the mall was PACKED, but it was time we spent together without having to worry about anything. Then we went over to Borders to browse and pass the time in relative quiet. We found a book to read together and then headed over to Olive Garden for dinner.

Dinner was....very very good. And I'm not referring to the food, although that was fantastic and I ate everything (odd for me; I usually get too full). Sometimes when we go out to dinner, we don't talk very much. Maybe our brains just stop functioning for a while because we're relaxing, I don't know. But this time, I wanted to make sure that we really talked. I asked John about classes and work and if he was feeling any anxiety about having another baby. We talked all through dinner, in the car on the way to pick up Aiden, in the car on the way home, and well into the night after we put Aiden to bed. I think we talked more than we have in the past three weeks.
We were able to really reconnect with each other last night and when I woke up this morning, I realized how much I've been missing my husband. I feel so lucky to have the relationship with him that I do. I have a feeling that this holiday season could be very good for our marriage. We've been so focused on getting John through work and this school term and preparing for the baby, we've sort of forgotten that marriage isn't maintenance-free. I haven't felt this good mentally in a long time.

We're getting there...

I had an appointment with a midwife this morning, and I say A midwife because mine happened to be out sick and they didn't call me. Which was fine, I was perfectly happy with the midwife I saw today and it was good to familiarize myself with her in case she's the one who delivers the baby. I was pleased that they hadn't called me though because I had some concerns and really wanted to be seen this morning. I'll spare you the ugly details, but it had been listed under "possible pre-term labor symptoms" on the handout I was given, so I was a little worried. Everything seems ok, but if it continues I'll need to be checked and monitored for a while.

I'm measuring right on time, which is great! I measured a little small with Aiden, so I'm pleasantly surprised to be "normal" with this one. Nathan appears to be head-down and should be weighing around 3 1/2 pounds and measuring about 18 inches long. I'm 7 pounds away from my target weight of 135 and I gained about 5 pounds in the past 2 1/2 weeks. I finally feel like I might reach the target weight, especially with loads of holiday food just around the corner!! I was a little worried about not gaining like they wanted me to, because I seemed to be stuck there for a month or so. But I gained most of my weight in the last trimester with Aiden, so I guess that's happening this time too.

I'm finally in the zone where I'm preparing things for labor and birth. Nathan's clothes are washed and sorted, his going home bag is packed, my birth plan is written up, and I'll finalize my hospital pre-registration this afternoon. Of course there's still many things to do, but it feels so good (and so real!) to work on these things. I'm very eager to hold my baby, smell the new baby smell, and see how much he looks like his big brother.

Come on, December 6!

Why December 6? It's the magic date for John being done with this school term. I'm not just wanting it to be over for me, but for him as well. This term has been very different from the others and I think it's really stressing him out. Different job, living further away from the campus (about an hour each direction), baby on the way....I don't blame him for being more stressed than he's ever been. Plus, Aiden and I don't get to see him very often during the week. It gets old fast. Just about 3 more weeks to go and we can calm down for a short while before this baby gets here.

I feel like my posts have been a little mopey lately and I'm honestly not trying to dump my problems on everyone who reads this. There have just been many things to bring up a lot of stress and worry. And then on days like today when my husband is sullen and quiet, it makes it worse. I try to give him a lot of space to get his homework done and have his downtime because I know he needs it. The hardest part is trying to not throw a bunch of baby-related stuff his way. He has enough on his mind already. He works so hard. I don't think I could do it, at least not for very long.

If all of this sounds like I'm upset with our current situation, I'm really not. I just tend to worry about anything and everything, even if I'm very happy with the way life is going. I'm so excited about bringing a new baby into our lives (and getting his feet out of my rib cage), I'm excited about it being holiday season again, and I'm extremely proud of my husband for everything he does for his family. We just have to make it 3 more weeks without having our heads explode. :^) Luckily, I have plenty of things to keep me occupied until then. Like lots and lots of baby clothes to wash and sort....

Is my faith being tested or is this normal?

Aiden is turning into a huge handful. Yeah, he's been acting like a two year old and that's to be expected, but after this weekend....I just don't know where it's coming from.
I was given a beautiful baby shower on Saturday and received many gifts. Aiden was napping when I got home and by the time he woke up, John and I had brought in everything and stacked it up on the couch. Aiden took one look at all the baby items and launched into a three hour long temper tantrum. He even began grabbing baby shoes and angrily throwing them to the ground.

Today is really no different. We've put all the baby stuff away (except there are some baby clothes stacked in Aiden's room - I may need to hide those), but it's like the damage has been done. I'm having constant back pain, so I can't pick him up and that makes him mad. I have to eat every hour or so, and that makes him mad. Anything and everything is making him mad. He'll be fine one minute and then be on the floor kicking and screaming the next, for no apparent reason.

I have to feel some relief that it's a holiday and John has tonight off from class. Otherwise I'd be on my own until 10pm. And I have to be happy that we are financially secure enough that I can decide to order pizza tonight to make my day go a little easier. Yesterday I felt like I was doing well in being thankful for what we have and in turning to God when I'm having a rough time with something. Obviously, I'm not perfect at it and at times I feel as though I'm still an infant in my faith. But today is really pushing it. I was only up with Aiden for an hour before I started feeling as though I was losing control and raising my voice at him. I've put Aiden down for a nap and said a quick prayer for strength and patience. I need to get better at this because I know it's just going to get more difficult when I've got a newborn to care for as well. Anyone know of any good devotionals for moms?

Chocolate? Donuts? Anyone?

Basically from the moment I got pregnant this time around (that might be a bit of an exaggeration...), I've had the worst sweet tooth ever. All I want is sugar. In fact, I'm sitting here drinking a coke and popping snack size Milky Way Midnights. I do have my moments where I crave a big fat bacon burger, or bananas on corn flakes like I did the other day, but mostly it's just sweets. Donuts are a big craving for me and surprisingly, I've been able to keep myself from them for the most part. I think I've only had donuts three times during the pregnancy. Granted, one of those times I ended up eating 8 (yes, eight) powdered donuts. I still will count this as only one time out of three. Honestly, I can't believe I didn't get sick.

I am a tiny person, so most people would probably say to eat as much of whatever I please. I've been doing really well with weight gain this pregnancy and only have ten pounds to go until I hit my target weight of 135. Hello Thanksgiving dinner!
There are other benefits to needing extra weight. I'm becoming quite an accomplished chef and can whip up dishes that I would have been terrified to try this same time last year. But, because of all this extra food, John has been eating just about as much as I have been. I guess it's to be expected and I guess you could say that it's his turn. He actually lost weight while I was pregnant with Aiden. We are convinced that it's because I left no food for him to eat. This is certainly not a problem this time around.

So what's for dinner? Fettucine with sausage, topped with pesto and mozzarella; baked maple acorn squash; homemade butter breadsticks; and a streudel-filled coffee cake for dessert. But later on I'll probably take a trip to the store for some donuts. :^)

The adventures of a 2 year old

No, make that just the injuries of a 2 year old. Aiden was hopping around, pretending to be Tigger as he likes to do (kind of odd, considering he was watching Elmo at the time), when he got some pretty good air under his feet and then landed wrong on his right foot. I attended to him immediately and he basically stopped crying right away, but continued to hold his foot. Being 2, he can't really tell me what hurts or how much, so I've got to try to figure this out on my own. I thought since he stopped crying fairly fast, I'd just let it go. But as I watch him, I see that every time he tries to walk, he starts limping and whimpering in pain. Great.
I leave a message for the advice nurse and wait....they tell you it can take up to 2 hours for them to call back, but it only took about 20 minutes - thank goodness! Basically, she says he absolutely needs to be seen. She doesn't even ask me any other questions about it. Just that he might need an x-ray and they can get us in at 5:20. Now I have to call John to see if he can make it home from work in time and skip some of his class tonight. Luckily, he laughed at the fact that our son was goofing around and didn't get annoyed.

This wouldn't be so bad if I weren't in horrible pain from my unborn child trying to come out the top of my stomach. And since Aiden is hurting, he wants to be carried and held. Which would be fine, but every time I pick him up it feels like my lower back muscles are going to rip into tiny pieces. I don't know if that's actually possible, but it sure feels like it. So I'm in awful pain and exhausted. And through all the time on the phone, Aiden leaked through his diaper and soaked onto my only pair of clean maternity pants. Awesome, now I have to do laundry too.

I guess it won't be so bad as long as I can get out of cooking tonight. :^)

Christmas Party! (A bit early, I know)

We found out yesterday that John's company is putting on a Christmas party and is close to finalizing the plans. This is something new for us, as the Red Cross didn't have Christmas parties. I guess when you're a non-profit, you just don't do things like that.
Even though it's still about a month or so away, I'm still really excited about it. When it happens, I'll be around a month away (more or less) from having the baby and an outing like this will be much needed. We'll get a babysitter for Aiden, we'll get dressed up, and we'll have a beautiful, relaxing adult evening in either downtown Portland or Lake Oswego. And that will be the last time that will happen for quite a while....
When John sent me the email about it from work yesterday, one of my first thoughts was "I wonder if there's going to be an open bar?". I quickly remembered that even if there was, I was not going to be able to celebrate the holidays in that manner. Silly me. John was happy though, because this means I'm the designated driver by default. And yes, there will be an open bar.
Is it weird to excited over something that's a month (or more) away? I guess the holidays have always been exciting for me, so that's part of it. But I suppose that I'm just so deprived of quality time with my husband, that a fancy date in a month really sticks in my head. Thank goodness I have things to keep me busy until then!

The changes a new baby brings....

John and I wanted to take it easy this weekend, with not too much going on, as we haven't gotten to spend REAL time with each other for a while. Of course, things never go completely as planned and while the weekend wasn't stressful, it definitely brought to our attention that this baby requires a lot of change.

Saturday was full of errands, directionally challenged people (who all seemed to be at either Target or Jamba Juice), and me nearly passing out in the middle of a store. I think I was just low on fluids, but it's still a little scary when the room begins to spin.
Sunday we skipped church (naughty!) to catch up on sleep and were invited out to lunch with John's grandparents. As we were pulling into their driveway, we noticed the neighbors were having a yard sale. I don't get extra excited over yard sales, but when I saw that they had a toddler bed in perfect condition, we had to stop. We left Aiden with the great-grandparents (who had also noticed the bed and wondered if we were interested) for a few minutes while we walked down to check the price. It was priced at $50, but she had just lowered it to $40. It looked as though it had never been used! We bought it so fast.... It was exactly the same as the one we were considering at Babies R Us, which was around $100.
After lunch (thank God for buffets), we headed back over to John's grandparents to load up the toddler bed and 2 dressers that they had picked up for us from another relative. We were also given a small toaster oven that had never been used and our baby shower gift of a brand new Diaper Champ! Once all these things were in our apartment, we began rearranging bedrooms. This didn't get too far and it's going to take a bit of thinking to figure out how everything needs to go for the baby. I'm now starting to get overwhelmed....I thought we were a little more ready than this.

We had set up the toddler bed in Aiden's room and he was acting very excited over it. So, we thought we'd see if he was ready to make the transition from his crib. We put all his bedding on the new bed and went through his bedtime routine like normal. He was ok for about 10 minutes. Then we heard slight crying....and then it turned into extremely upset screaming. Once he began banging on his door (showing that he was NOT staying in that bed), we attended to him. He was so upset over the whole thing, we put all of his bedding back into the crib and did bedtime all over again (kind of a reset). He didn't make a sound after that. I guess he's just not quite ready and that's ok. I was really nervous about trying it and now I'm really nervous about it. We have time though and that's slightly reassuring. We'll be using a cradle for the first few months, so we could go at least 6 more months from now before he needs to give up the crib. I just wish it wouldn't have been so traumatic last night.

So now, I'm just attempting to get prepared for this baby. The baby shower is on Saturday, so I'm sure I'll have a little more of an idea of exactly how prepared we really are (or aren't) after that. And of course, my husband had to decide last night to have an in-depth conversation with me about whether or not we should have a 3rd child. I am making no decisions until this one is done baking, thank you very much!

A Minthorne Halloween

Since Aiden is a little older now, I knew that we could really try to get him into Halloween this year. We ended up having a lot of fun with him and the pictures of this Harvest season will be a treasure for our family. Here's a few to share! :^)
Our little Winnie the Pooh in his costume for the first time! He loved it!!

Aiden and daddy at Baggenstos Farms Pumpkin Patch.

Aiden trying to pick up a pumpkin. It didn't go very well...

Aiden found a pen and decided to decorate his pumpkin. Normally he's not allowed to have pens (he draws on the wall), but it was too cute to pass up this time.

At grandma's house, getting ready to go trick or treating.

Aiden did a good job at humoring mommy in her pregnant housewife from the 50s costume. I basically just ended up being a pregnant Lucille Ball!